It started with me walking alone down a familiar tree-lined street in my hometown in Germany, until I stopped beneath a singular large tree with knotted roots that I for some reason kicked at gently with my little black shoes. As I did that, the row of houses to my side disappeared, and instead I could see a misty white glow, drawing me in. As I walked to the centre of the mist, I passed people (mostly adults) on either side of me, some walking in, some walking out, but none familiar to me. Ahead in the mist lay a vast bridge of concrete and white railings, very modern, and very reassuring and 'sturdy' as beneath it was an even more vast ocean of liquid amber, a viscous lava coloured, glowing and churning sea, facinating me as I pushed my face close to the railings I held on to, being too small to see above it.
I kept walking, as eveyone else around me did, suddenly seeing someone waving in the middle of the bridge, seemingly to me. As I walked on closer, I knew it was my grandfather, who had passed away three years before. I ran and he swooped me up and held me for ages. I had last seen him when a baby, and had no waking memory of him, and yet still he was familiar here in this strange panoramic landscape with it's soft glowing, fractal, orange atmosphere. Featureless, forever, but for the ocean below and the concrete stretching bridge. Holding my hand and making it sternly clear to me that I should not let go unless he said I could, we walked slowly further on until the veil of mist suddenly lifted altogether, and I could suddenly see 270 degrees or so around me at once, without moving my eyes or head. Later, I had the experience of being able to see 360 degrees around, but at that point in time, I was getting used to 270, which is an experience that's very hard to describe! There is no frame of reference in body that compares.
The atmosphere and separate ocean had changed to a single dense, iridescent sea that one could breathe in, and fly in, and as I was getting used to that idea (of not needing to walk) the bridge began to "break up" visually and slowly disappear. My grandfather explained with a smile that I didn't need it anymore beyond that point. Other people around me were also getting used to that idea, with varying degrees of surprise and even fear. I'm not sure whether this was a special group event, or the usual 'spot' for this to occur all the time. About this time, I noticed my grandfather himself begin to break-up visually with the outline of his body started to disappear upon looking directly at him, leaving in it's place whirls of the same 'sea' that we were in, though retaining his shape. I realised that the only difference between his body and the atmosphere was the shaping of it through these little whorls. There were lots of them, of varying sizes, with the largest at his forehead, stomach, and chest. I had no idea what I was seeing at the time, being so young, but of course they were in the same areas as chakras. At this point, my grandfather allowed my hand to leave his, as he told me I could now explore the vastness on my own, and as long as I thought of him, I could return to meet him before leaving.
Children normally fear separation from anything or anyone familiar, and yet here I was happy to leave not only the only recognisable person around me, but literally the only 'thing' in this incredible expanse of space, as the other people had "changed" into energy whorls but my grandfather still had some features left. That's how comforting and somehow familiar in itself this place was. Just before I took his advice and floated upwards from where we were, I looked down at my self and was startled to see I too had changed into a shape of whorling energy. This was facinating, and I paid close attention for some time to the dancing iridescent 'particles', like tv snow, that swarmed into amber whorls within my being.
As I flew (or perhaps swam ... as the atmosphere was thick and more like fluid than air), what I'd thought was an undifferentiating orange coloured sea took on bands of shades, from palest gold yellow through to dark burnt toffee, in fractal patterns. Each pale area was like a doorway, a portal for beings to enter and leave. The big picture was like being inside a tree with fractal branches, each unfolding as I went down them, and each made from that same massive sea of swarming particles that I was composed from. I felt very safe and at peace, yet very excited too, with the curiosity yet acceptance of a child. I noticed that my vision began to separate into two types that alternated. One was seeing people and the atmosphere as those buzzing particles which occured in whorls within a body shape, and the other was smooth with white wave 'wake' lines before and after a person moved along. In this vision mode, a person seemed to look like a lense that temporarily refracted light as it moved along like a soliton wave, moving energy without displacing anything. It's sometimes this that I see when I'm reading people's futures ... where the white lines go! After some time (or perhaps none?) I noticed one fractal doorway of light nearby, which I now moved towards and through ...
After the experience of being a part of one being, part of a living tapestry, it came as a shock to find myself in a cave. A sandstone cavern with a beautiful, serene view outside of blue water, beach sand, and milky pink sky. As I left the cave mouth, I felt the warmth in my body from the still-glowing particles that made up more-solid surroundings than before. One reason I have never written a detailed version of this dream or experience is that it will remind people of the movie "Contact", with Jodie Foster, lol! But yes, there was an unusual glow to the whole scene, and I was at a serene inner beach with an unusual coloured sky, after travelling down a fractal entrance. Enjoying the peace, and appreciating the pastel crystaline sand, I suddenly saw something darker move out of the corner of my eye.
I was amazed that there was a cold-looking group of three rocks at the far side of the beach. They seemed out of place here in this beautiful area. Nevertheless, the movement near them had made me curious and I found myself starting to walk towards them, my eyes never leaving the spot.
(to be cont)
© Kerstin Fehn 2011
0 comments:
Post a Comment